Embracing Your Size and Having Better Sex in the Process

Embracing Your Size and Having Better Sex in the Process
by Victoria Blisse Victoria Blisse

Society has been telling fat people they can’t be sexy for decades but the tide is now turning. Fat is sexy! However you prefer to label yourself: curvy, plump or voluptuous, this post is for you. Let’s celebrate fat bodies so we can enjoy the mind-blowing sex that we deserve!

I am fat.

How does reading that make you feel? For some people it might not evoke emotion at all. Others might feel pride or happiness in those words, but for others it might trigger negativity.

A negative response to being fat is known as fatphobia.  It can be a response that you have inside of yourself, or it can be one that you project onto others. Both are damaging, and both are highly prevalent in society.

However, fat is fighting back!  Celebrities like Lizzo and plus-size model Tess Hollliday claim their fatness and celebrate it. Thanks to them there is a wonderfully wobbly thrust of fat positivity in the media that not only shows fat bodies, but it screams about how beautiful they are.

We’ve all seen the articles shaming celebs for putting on weight. The ones the judge women for not bouncing back after pregnancy. And we see lotions, potions, diets and gadgets in advertisements day after day that make us feel bad about our bodies so we buy products to slim down and shape up.

Eff that.

Add Positivity to Your Life

Add Positivity to Your LifeYou are already beach ready, you are beautiful, and you have the perfect body for you. But how do you fight back against fatphobia and embrace your inner sex goddess?  Here are some tips.

Curate your space

Follow fat positive accounts over your social media and remove ones that make you feel bad about yourself. Don’t buy magazines that shame you for body size. Report ads that body shame when you’re browsing the internet.

Stop negative self talk

It’s hard to go from self-loathing to self loving but by cutting out the negative self talk you’re a step closer to it. When you’re naked, praise your wobbly bits for the work they do to keep you warm and functioning. It is your body, and it’s a miraculous thing indeed.

Praise all kinds of pretty

Let people know they look good in their social media selfies. Share photos of fat people looking hot in bikinis, and retweet inspirational fat positive quotes.  When you project positive vibes you get the benefit too.

Find Your Inner Sex Goddess

Find Your Inner Sex GoddessConfidence is sexy and embracing your body just as it is will feed that confidence. How do you take that into your sex life?  Start with yourself first.

Self love

Masturbation is more than just having an orgasm. We can so often use it as a means to an end, a quick fumble without really engaging with our bodies. When you have a little time, indulge in a luxurious wank with a sex toy or without. Instead of focusing on the spots that make you come, embrace your whole body.

Touch yourself

Trace your fingers over your own curves, scratch a little if that feels good to you. Pinch and poke your curves and dips. Get in touch with your body and how it feels. Yes, it might be difficult to do at first but keep trying. Block out any negative self talk and love every inch of you as you deserve to be loved.

See yourself

Look at yourself in a mirror! We so often want to hide our fat because we’ve been taught to be ashamed of it. Turning lights off and keeping clothes on. Before you can be comfortable getting naked with another person, work on accepting your own naked body.

Understand yourself

Watch as you turn yourself on, see what happens. Find the beauty of your rolls and abundance then you will be closer to sharing it with another.

Share Your Sexy

Share Your SexyWhen you get sexy with someone else it’s all about being comfortable in your skin. If you’re not ready to strip naked and straddle your lover quite yet you can work up to it.

Wear pretty lingerie that covers the areas you’re learning to love and that accentuate the bits you already love. There’s no rule that says you have to be naked for sex. So decorate your pretty body with other pretty things and peacock your sexiness!

Don’t be afraid to tell your lover when you’re not feeling confident too. Listen to what they tell you they love about you and see yourself through their eyes. It’s okay to need a little external validation now and then.

You know the tricks you learned while you’ve been masturbating? Use them with your lover. Let them watch you as you touch yourself or guide them to caress you in the places you love in the way you like.

Talk about your body. Big it up.

“You love my curves don’t you?”

“My boobs are so pillowy, feel!”

“My thick thighs are so biteable, want a taste?”

Conclusion

Remember you are fat, you are fabulous, and you are hot. You deserve sexual pleasure and great sex. Don’t let anyone tell you differently – especially not yourself!

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Victoria Blisse Written by Victoria Blisse.
Victoria Blisse is known as the Queen of Smut, Reverend to the kinky and is the Writer in Residence at Cocktails and Fuck Tales. Mancunian Odd Duck, her northern English quirkiness shows through in all of her stories along with her own particular brand of humor and romance that bring laughs and warm fuzzies in equal measure. Passion, love, and laughter fill her works, just as they fill her busy life.

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