Look around the internet for a few moments, and you’ll quickly realize some of us believe a lot of weird, bad, or just wrong things about sex. It’s not completely our fault. From incomplete or non-existent sex education and societal and cultural pressures, sex is only something people tend to think about right before they’re about to fuck.
One way to have better, more satisfying sex is to clear your head of the myths surrounding the act, foreplay, and what your partner might want – or not want. These aren’t all the things we get wrong about sex, but it’s a start.
What You See in Porn is Realistic
There are a variety of views on porn that range from a fun, fantasy that gets people off to absolutely detrimental to society, depending on your views. When written, produced, and paid for in ethical ways that take care of the performers, porn can be a great way to escape realism and help you masturbate. Here’s what porn isn’t — it isn’t real. Only in porn can the pizza delivery guy go from dressed and holding a pizza to naked with his penis shoved down someone’s throat with minimal conversation and time.
Getting Off is All That Matters
Here at Jack and Jill, we offer a huge variety of sex toys for the purpose of helping people get off. Better orgasms for you is one of goals, but let’s be real. As much fun as an orgasm can be, there’s more to sex than the orgasm. Intimacy, closeness, having fun, enjoying your partner’s body, and learning what you enjoy are just some of the things that happen when you get naked or semi-naked with a partner.
There’s Only One Way to Have Sex
Ask the majority of people what sex is and the definition they give is most often penetrative sex. Most mean penis-in-vagina or PIV. Some might consider anal sex, but it’s all about penetration. That’s not all the sex available. Neither partner may have penises. Your partner may have a penis but also have erectile dysfunction. If we only define sex as inserting tab A into slot B, a lot of sexy, fun, and orgasmic stuff gets left off the table – oral sex, handjobs, fingering, grinding/scissoring, or whatever else turns you and makes you feel good.
Everyone Wants Sex
A lot of people want sex. Maybe not all the time. Maybe not right now. But yes, most people enjoy sex, love sex, or are currently on the prowl for sex. Another reality rarely discussed is that some people are asexual. They don’t hate sex but they’re not interested in it. Other people would love to have more sex but not right now – think sleep-deprived parents with small children, anyone taking care of a sick family member, or someone with a lot of stress in their life. Sex is great and fun and wonderful – when you want it. Thinking everyone does is a big assumption on your part.
Everyone Enjoys the Same Thing
It’s (finally) becoming less common to believe every single person wants the exact same kind of sex, although there are still some holdouts. What most frequently happens is that you think since your last partner preferred a position or certain kind of touch, your current partner will too. You also quickly find out that’s not always true. You may also have a partner or two who doesn’t “get” how anyone would enjoy kink or rough sex. Each new sexual partner you have is a new opportunity to learn their sexual pleasure – and to find out if you’ll enjoy a new flavor sex, too.
You Shouldn’t “Need” Sex Toys
As much as it pains us to admit, there are people in the world who believe sex toys are only for lonely, desperate people who can’t get a partner or get off without help. Wrong! Sex toys add different sensations to your sexual experience. Toys allow you to stimulate parts of your body during sex or masturbation. They enhance your sex experience, help with intimacy, and give you a new way to enjoy something that could become routine after a while. Wanting or enjoying sex toys isn’t a problem to solve; it’s all about playing with pleasure.
Sex is one of the most basic, fundamental human functions you have – right up there with eating, sleeping, and going to the bathroom. You were conceived through it and (for the majority of people) at some point in your life, you wanted it, questioned it, or went on the hunt for it. Yet, many people are woefully ignorant about what sex is and isn’t. Reversing even a little of the wrong information you’ve been taught by media and society can lead to better, more satisfying sex and fewer questions of, “Is this normal?” By the way, the answer is, usually, “Yes.”