From the Dungeon: A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM Safety

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From the now-ubiquitous Fifty Shades of Grey movie to the widespread popularity of fetishwear, it’s no wonder kink has made its way into the mainstream.

If you’re ready to try your hand at Bondage and Discipline, Dominance or Submission (BDSM), understand that safety comes before you do.

When practiced incorrectly, it can turn you off to the joys of bondage entirely. At worst, it can leave lasting emotional and physical scars.

Heed the following safety tips to ensure the best experience for all kinky players.

Set boundaries

Before either of you even think about rough sex, you need to have a conversation. Mojo Upgrade is a great way for couples to discuss fantasies without embarrassment.

Once both partners take the survey, only the sex acts in which you both showed interest are revealed. All conversations should also include hard and soft limits—things you will absolutely not do and things you may be interested in but are unsure of, respectively.

You might find that, in the moment, you’re suddenly uncomfortable with a scene you thought you’d love. That’s okay. Consent is the foundation of BDSM, which leads us to our next topic.

Safe words

To establish clear indicators of discomfort—whether physical or emotional—both partners should choose a safe word and gesture.

The dominant partner should check in with his or her submissive regularly and both should understand that anyone can pump the brakes at any time.

Your “stop” word can be anything you want. You can pick something silly like “coconut” or stick to traditional traffic signals where green means “This is great,” yellow means “Ease up a bit,” and red says, “I want to stop now.” If you’ve set a scene in which it will be difficult to speak, establish gestures such as three shakes of the head to mean stop.

Other safety tips

  • Never leave a bound or gagged person alone.
  • Learn CPR and keep a first aid kit handy.
  • Ease into bondage with extreme restraints rather than highly technical Shibari play.
  • When you’re ready to try extreme bondage fantasies, opt for sex toys and accessories that are made for BDSM play. Do not use household items.
  • Practice after-care to decompress emotionally and physically after sex. BDSM can be overwhelming especially to a novice. Kiss, cuddle, talk, massage, eat, replenish electrolytes—it’s essential.

Jack and Jill

From curious submissives to domination experts, Jack and Jill proudly carries the attire and toys you need to get into the BDSM scene.

Live out your wildest fantasies with the comfort of knowing that our shipping is always discreet and that your satisfaction is our top priority.

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